By: Chaya Sora Jungreis-Gertzulin

My beloved mother, Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis a”h, was unfortunately painfully weak and ill. I only wanted to be with my ema as much possible.

“Chaya Sorale, could you please get me a cup of water.” I would run down to the kitchen, wanting to fulfill my mother’s request. My mother would take a few sips, and then put the cup down. A little while later, my mother would tell me that she was sorry to bother me, but could I get her a coffee. Once again, I would go downstairs, this time bringing up a coffee. Again, ema would take only a few sips.

I realized that my mother was giving me a special gift, an opportunity to fulfill the mitzva of kibud av v’eim, honoring one’s parents. A mitzva that would be with me. With each cup, ema gave me yet another gift – a special bracha. As weak as ema was, she would turn to me saying, “Chaya Sarale, come here. Let me give you a bracha”. My mother would put her hands on my head and bentch me. A bracha for gezunt, for myself, my husband, my children and grandchildren. Brachos of “nachas from the kinderlech”. A bracha of nachas from myself, to be happy with where I am in life. Brachos to follow in the footsteps of our holy zeides and bubbas. Long, meaningful brachos, given with a mother’s love and tears.

What I would give to hear my mother’s voice, to receive her brachos once again.

In this week’s parsha, Toldos, Yitzchak Avinu turns to Eisav with a request. “I am old, and don’t know the day of my death. Go out to the field and hunt for me some game. Then make for me ‘matamim’, savory food, just the way I like it, in order that my soul may bless you before I die.” (Bereishis 27:2-4)

Did an elderly Yitzchak, a tzaddik of a man, really need a savory meat dish? Is that what was missing from his life? Of course not.

Yitzchak was a loving father. Eisav was his son. A father wants to do for a son. Yitzchak wanted to give Eisav a merit. A chance to do the mitzva of kibud av v’eim, a reason to be worthy of a bracha.

The Ohr HaChaim (1696-1743) teaches that Yitzchak hoped that by giving Eisav a bracha, he would change his ways. As a father, Yitzchak never gave up on his son. This doesn’t mean that Yitzchak thought Eisav was the one to carry on his legacy, but it does mean that he loved him for being his son.

Rabbi Meir of Premishlan (1703-73) explains that Yitzchak took his actions up to shamayim with him, pleading before HaShem. “I also had a son who sinned. I loved him, and forgave him. I am a basar v’dam, a man of flesh and blood. You, Ribbono shel Olam, are infinite and known for Your compassion. How much more so must You forgive Your children, and look at all Your children, bnei Yisroel, with ahava.”

This leads us to a deeper question about the nature of Yitzchak’s love for Eisav. The Chumash tells us “Va’yeh’eh’hav Yitzchak es Eisav kee tzayid b’feev, and Yitzchak loved Eisav, for game was in his mouth, v’Rivka o’heh’ves es Yaakov, but Rivka loves Yaakov.” (Bereishis 24:28).

How does one explain the difference in tense. Regarding Yitzchak, the past tense “va’yeh’eh’hav” is used, while regarding Yaakov, “o’heh’ves” in the present tense is used. The Shelah HaKadosh (1555-1630) explains that Yitzchak loved Eisav because of what he did. A father looking for the good in his son, Eisav’s bringing meat to him. A love contingent on an action. But Rivka’s love for Yaakov was constant, loving him for whom he is.

Yitzchak’s love was a love in this world, while Rivka’s was an everlasting, eternal love, both in this world and in Olam Haba.

While there is an understanding that Yitzchak knew exactly what Eisav was up to, Rashi cites a Midrash that comments otherwise. The Torah uses the term tzayid, having the same root as tzaid, a trap. Eisav knew how to “entrap” his father Yitzchak. With his words, he was able to deceive his father, convincing Yitzchak that he was observing mitzvos.

Yitzchak grew up in the house of Avraham and Sara. A house full of chesed and emes. These midos formed Yitzchak’s pure neshama, a soul that only saw the good.

Rivka, on the other hand, was from Aram, raised in the house of Besuel. Her brother was Lavan, She grew up in a home of tricksters, in a culture of dishonesty. Rivka was keen on Eisav’s actions. When Rivka hears that Yitzchak was prepared to give Eisav a bracha, she feels that it’s time to intervene. To make it known to Yitzchak that Eisav was truly not deserving of the bracha. As we know, Eisav sold the bechora, the honor and privilege of the firstborn for a bowl of red bean soup. “Vayivez Eisav es ha’bechora, And Eisav despised the firstborn birthright.” It didn’t mean anything to him.

Rivka was in a quandary. She felt it was her obligation to stop Eisav from receiving the bracha, but she was unsure how.

Rivka was the “veiled” one. When she first saw Yitzchak, he was davening in the field. She was awestruck, immediately recognizing the holiness and greatness that Yitzchak represented. She took her veil and covered herself. Rivka was a modest and humble woman. She was honored to be Yitzchak’s wife, and would only approach him with great respect. She was not a woman who would raise her voice, and did everything in her power to avoid confrontation. Yet, she wanted to make her point known to Yitzchak.

Rivka devised a plan, that Yaakov should don Eisav’s clothing and bring food to his father. She tells Yaakov, “Sh’ma b’koli, Listen to my voice”.

Rabbi Samson Raphael Hirsch (1808-88) teaches that Yaakov’s dressing like Eisav was to shock Yitzchak. It was Rivka’s way of gently telling Yitzchak how easy it was to be fooled. Life is a masquerade. Eisav is making himself into something that he isn’t. Please don’t fall for it. As Rav Hirsch so eloquently explains, “That if Yaakov, an ish taam, a pure soul, so easily masquerades as a gibor tzayid, a powerful hunter, how much more easily can Eisav masquerade as an ish taam.”

Rivka’s plan worked, and Yitzchak blesses Yaakov.

Life is a masquerade. As we look at the world around us, things are not always not what they seem to be. We have to do our best and place our trust in HaShem, the All-knowing who sees behind the masks. We ask Him for guidance to lead us in the right direction, to give us the wisdom to discern between what is real and what is masked.

Shabbat Shalom!

Chaya Sora

Chaya Sora can be reached at [email protected]

This article was written L’zecher Nishmas / In Memory Of HaRav Meshulem ben HaRav Osher Anshil HaLevi, zt”l and Rebbetzin Esther bas HaRav Avraham HaLevi, zt”l