By: Chaya Sora Jungreis-Gertzulin

Time to go home. Many years have passed since Yaakov left his parents’ home, in fear of his brother Eisav. He lived in exile with his uncle Lavan, working for him for twenty long, hard years.

These years were also years of bracha, during which Yaakov was blessed with wives, children, and many flocks of sheep.

Yaakov gathers his family and is preparing to embark on the journey to his homeland.

“Vayishlach Yaakov malochim, and Yaakov sent messengers ahead of him” (Bereishis 32:4) Yaakov is worried. Is his brother Eisav still harboring feelings of hate and animosity towards him? Is Eisav still out to get him? Will his family be endangered when they meet up with Eisav?

Yaakov sends messengers ahead, “limtzo chein, to find favor” in Eisav’s eyes. Rashi tells us it was a mission of peace and friendship. “Mevakesh ahavoscha, (that Yaakov is) seeking your (Eisav’s) love”

The messengers returned with alarming news. Eisav is heading towards Yaakov with an army of four hundred men.

When my children were preschoolers, they learned a little song.

Eisav is coming with four-hundred men…

Yaakov is davening to HaShem….

A little chant that is easy to remember. A story of two opposing worlds. Eisav, and the world of power and might; Yaakov, and the world of Torah and tefilla.

Four hundred. An impressive number. It is interesting to note that the gematria, numerical value of the words ayin rah, evil eye, is equal to four hundred (ayin=70, yud=10, nun=50, reish=200, ayin=70). Eisav was not only approaching with an army, but with an ayin rah, an eye reflecting negativity and hostility. An eye that looked upon his brother with jealousy and envy.

Eisav never got over his feelings of jealousy from years back. An emotion so deeply embedded in him that he couldn’t “fargin” his only brother. He couldn’t find it within himself to be happy for Yaakov’s mazel. To look at Yaakov’s family and say “I’m so happy for you. I wish you only good. You should have continued mazel and bracha.” Instead, he looked at his brother with daggers in his eyes. An ayin hara, an evil eye.

To be a farginner means to be joyous for another’s good fortune. It means when your co-worker gets a promotion, and you’re stuck in the same place, you wish congratulations with a full heart. It means that when your friend becomes a grandmother, and you’re still hoping to see your daughter married, you wish mazel tov with sincerity and genuineness.

I have a friend whose daughter had a long journey until she made it down the aisle. Yet, my friend shared with me that her daughter loved going to weddings, even when she was an older single. She was just so happy to be at a simcha and share in another’s happiness.

Having an ayin tov, a good eye, means having a positive outlook towards others and to be happy for their successes and possessions. It not only makes one a better person, it also serves as a protection from an ayin rah, a non-farginning eye. If an ayin rah contracts one’s heart and shrinks one’s world, an ayin tov expands it—allowing a person to rejoice in blessings that are not their own.

In all the years that Yaakov was away, nothing changed. Eisav was still Eisav. Still jealous, still looking at his brother with an ayin rah. Pirkei Avos teaches “Rabbi Yehoshua says, an evil eye, an evil inclination, and hatred of others, removes a person from this world.” (Pirkei Avos 2:11).

An evil eye means to look at another’s home, accomplishments, possessions and family with jealousy. To have feelings of envy that’s all consuming, to the point of having no peace, never being satisfied with what one has. To be in a frame of mind that is filled with negativity.

The Torah tells us that Yaakov readies himself for his encounter with Eisav in three ways:

1. He prepares for the worst and divides his family into two camps. This way, if one group would be attacked, the second group would be able to escape.
2. He sends gifts to Eisav, hoping to placate him.
3. He cries out to HaShem with prayer.

The Talmud teaches that “bracha can only be found in something that is hidden from the eye.” (Bava Metzia 42a). To be hidden. Not to be out there. There is no need to flaunt one’s blessings in life. Yaakov divided his camp into two, for Eisav need not see all the children standing together.

We search for segulas, something that protects us from harm, including an ayin hara. People want a quick fix, an easy answer, as if some magical words will do the trick. But our rabbis teach that the best protection is to live modestly, without bragging or fanfare. Not to be in everyone’s face. In our world of Twitter, Facebook, TikTok and Instagram, we should be sensitive and avoid posting all of our amazing vacation shots, the results of our latest shopping sprees, even family photo spreads. Share with the nearest and dearest… but don’t yield to the impulse to share everything with your full list of contacts – and even beyond. When tempted to share publicly, ask: “Why am I posting this? Is it necessary? Does it uplift or provoke envy?”

There is a beautiful tefilla that many recite every day following the morning brachos. “Yehi ratzon, may it be Your will, HaShem, that You save me today and every day, from…. an evil person, an evil inclination…. an evil eye…”

Yes, we need HaShem’s help with every step in life. But first, we must take a lesson from Yaakov. Not be out there. The Midrash relates that when Yaakov sent his sons to Egypt to obtain food during the famine, he instructed them to enter through ten different gates rather than all together. He was afraid that people might be jealous and wish them bad fortune if they would see ten healthy, strong brothers together.

Even on his deathbed, when Yaakov blessed Ephraim and Menashe, the negative power of an ayin hara was on his mind. He blessed them with the words “V’yidgu larov b’kerev ha-aretz, to grow and multiply in the land.” Yaakov used the term v’yidgu, let them grow and multiply. The root of v’yidgu is dug, fish, for fish are in the sea, covered by water, hidden from the eye. While Yaakov blessed Yosef and his children that they should be many, he wanted them to be like fish, hidden and protected from an ayin hara.

May the blessings of Yaakov be with us all. May we, too, flourish and always be protected from the evil eye.

Shabbat Shalom!

Chaya Sora

Chaya Sora can be reached at [email protected]

This article was written L’zecher Nishmas / In Memory Of HaRav Meshulem ben HaRav Osher Anshil HaLevi, zt”l and Rebbetzin Esther bas HaRav Avraham HaLevi, z